Stuck in a Rutberg

The Source

Rutberg & Company

The Setup

Part of an invitation to attend a wireless conference.

Hammer Words

Due to its small size, exclusive invitation list, diversity of C-level delegates, and highly collaborative format, the annual Wireless Influencers conference is the world’s premier executive forum to evaluate and influence the growth and future of wireless and mobility.

Crushing Force

This may be the gold standard in hammer words and was the original sentence that inspired this blog.  I’d been thinking about hammer words for a while, but this single sentence is so chock full of ten dollar words that I just had to stop watching TV and eating ice cream to write this.

Right away, the author positions “small size” as a benefit, though the rest of the sentence may compensate for the difficulty in drumming up attendees.  Anyway, “Due to…” is a clue that some elaborate construction may follow.

Let’s tally this up…

My favorite part is the “diversity of C-level delegates”, a wonderful combination of political correctness and corporate code speak. When I was growing up, everyone wanted to be president. Now, you have to be CEO. Even churches have CEOs. Of course, who wants to be a “vice president” in the era of CEOs? No, it’s better to be a “C-level” executive. When I read this sentence to my wife, she wondered aloud what it had to do with “sea level.” She was briefly confused, which is the intent: you have to be part of the current corporate milieu to understand the crucial importance of the “C-level.”

“Diversity of C-level delegates” is beautiful – from its tolling d’s to its shining c’s and all the riches of meaning between. “Delegates” go to the U.N., which is incredibly diverse, and diversity is the mostest bestest word ever. (I love diversity. It is the real goodness behind every idea.) All important companies have a ranking diversity officer – not usually at the C-level, though he or she should be – and this extraordinary conference offers not just one kind C-level executive, but a true diversity that is fair and just to all.

The sentence even conjures up a dress code: U.N. delegates in their flowing robes and toga-ed Roman senators at the “forum.”  This is serious stuff.

So, if you’re an “influencer” – oooooo – in the “wireless” industry – aaaahhh – you can bend these delegates to your will in a highly collaborative way by attending this nifty conference.

Published in: on September 25, 2006 at 2:24 am  Leave a Comment  

The URI to TrackBack this entry is:

RSS feed for comments on this post.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: